I am contemplating a career change. Actually I’m passed the contemplation stage, and am striving to get my money up. Career changes come with life changes. Changes for me, my availability, for my family, etc. This career change would require me to go back to school for 2 years….. I really feel drawn/pushed to do this and let me share why…..
I was on the elevator and this old man. He asked the people on the elevator what would we do if we were given $1M. I answered last. And I don’t usually answer a stranger’s question but I did this time JIC he was going to give us $1M…. My answer was, “Pay off my student loans and car. Buy a Farm. Farm. Become a midwife. And catch babies until I died.” He said my answer was the best answer and got off the elevator. I have yet to receive any gold.
As a child I had always wanted to be an OB. But I really didn’t want to be an MD. When I was in college I majored in pre-med and worked as an EKG tech in the summers My 1st summer working, I watched 1 woman die. She was alive when I got there and dead when I left. She was afraid with all the people around her working furiously on her. At 1 point I saw tears fall from her eyes. I just stood there. That’s what my job required me to do. They asked me to do and EKG to confirm the heart was no longer pumping. I did it. She was still warm and sweaty. Her eyes were open, her pupils were dilated. I was absolutely certain I could not tolerate med school. I couldn’t reconcile the desire to deliver babies but not go to med school. So… I went to Dental School instead. My parents insisted that I become a doctor. They always get what they want and are forceful about that. I didn’t really like it and my career as a dentist reflects that.
I have been meditating for my life’s purpose for some time. My childhood desire keeps coming back. I kept dismissing it. But nothing else was coming forward. How could something I wanted to do 30+ years ago be my true path? I’m a different person than I was even a decade ago. So much in fact when I look at pictures, I almost don’t recognize myself. The face is the same… the clothes, the hair, the eyes and the motivations are not. I’m already a doctor. Could I be a midwife?
My mother has always been suspicious about me becoming a dentist; though she supported me. She had wanted to be a lawyer at a time Black women only were nurses and teachers. She had no support of her dreams, and consequently didn’t achieve them. She settled; and has been miserable every day since. That is not lost on me. My mother has an intuition that I wish I could ignore, but can’t. She knew dentistry made me unhappy but refused to say that to me out loud. And she is not known for her tactfulness. Instead she said she’d help me to be a teacher or something else. When I broached the midwife thing to her, she initially looked deep within me and when she came out, she was smiling. Then said, “You always wanted to catch babies.” Then she said, “Your great grandmother was a midwife. And a good one at that. She delivered me. Maybe she is reaching out to.” My mother doesn’t use contractions when she is being serious. Decision confirmed.
Of course, I must divine the outcome of such a life changing decision. Yes feeling is important. Portal of entry is important. Being led in a direction is important. So is divination. The divination confirmed my plan.
So why do I call it the “Path of the Goddess”? Because caring for women during the magical gestational period and safely ushering lives from one realm to another is work of a Goddess. Do a goddess search and you will find many so called goddesses who fit this bill. I’m casting my lot with them. Can you think of a better mundane career for a female rootworker?
While in dental school, I attended a Sunday School class. The leader of the class knew I was in school… as did the entire church. He kept commenting on how wonderful it was that I knew my life’s purpose at such an early age. I had no idea what he was talking about. Though later I recognized that I couldn’t understand his meaning because dental school was not my life’s purpose. I have always looked down on people who don’t get their life’s calling until they were older. And the 40’s are older… to me. But here I am. Almost 43. Starting over. Well…. What are you gonna do?
The HooDoo Honey And soon to be in 2 years midwife!