It’s Halloween y’all!!!! Some folks call it Samhain. I call it fun. It has always been my favorite holiday since I was a child. I went trick or treating every year until I was 22! I make my own costumes and truly just really celebrate on this day and always did. I suppose deep down I knew I was a HooDoo. Anywho…. The veil is thin now. I have been communicating with my dead people.
ATR tradition says that only blood relations are ancestors. I beg to differ. Probably because my Culture of being a Black American changed that view. In this wilderness because of the advent of this version of slavery, Black people have a phrase that really strikes to the heart. “We are family because we say so.” So many families are just that. There are so many stories of people that just took others in and named them children, siblings parents or grandparents. And not because they shared blood but because they had a connection. And you would be hard pressed to tell them they weren’t kin. I feel that way. I have dead folks in my ethereal cipher that aren’t related to me by blood but I know they are there and they are pulling for me. This is my love letter to my dead people….
Dear Michael, (Husband)
I love you today and will continue to forever love you. You were the love of my youth. That crazy, fanatical, life and world changing kind of love. You taught me that unconditional love is something that does in fact exist. You taught me what it was to be in a functional husband-wife relationship. And you taught me to be open to perfection in love and to not accept bullshit.
I will be forever your wife….
Mr. and Mrs. Thomas, (in laws)
I saw in the two of you a transcending love. Y’all were happily married for 58 years and you still retained the youthful exuberance of puppy love. You were a shining example of a perfect marriage. The way you loved each other and your children, yet had enough love to open your heart and home to other people and treat them just like they were your own. Yours is the relationship I emulate in my own love matches.
I will always consider you to be my parents.
Mama Wells, (MIL)
I didn’t get a chance to really know you. But I can see you in Precise. The man he is, is greatly because of the mother you were and for that I am truly grateful.
There is not a day that passes that I don’t think of you. You made me a princess. You made me secure. I knew that nothing bad would ever happen as long as you lived. For that comfort I will be eternally grateful. My Daddy was a super man! You continually teach me that I MUST never just relax and let things come to me. That I must keep it fresh, I must keep it beautiful, that I must keep it healthy.
You were my surrogate dad and I was your surrogate daughter. I knew that I was always loved by you. I remember that time before you can to live with us, when I called for you in the middle of the night and you got up, got dressed and came to answer my call. From another house! You have always been there for me to honestly answer my questions and be my bestie.
I didn’t really know you well. Distance will do that. But I do know I had a grandmother who did the grandmother type stuff for me and Clarence. I look at my mother and listen to her stories and I see you in the way she raised me. And I’m not mad. This is the time and place for women to have steel in their backs. You gave that to Mommie and she gave that to me. Thank you.
I didn’t know you at all. You died 30 years before my birth. I seek to walk in your footsteps in my vocation as a midwife. I ask that you walk with me and guide me.
When I was a child, I saw a Shirley Temple movie and the name escapes me. I think it was Blue Bird. But in this movie she visited with her grandparents in a dream. And the grandparents said as long as she remembered them they would live.
Shed tears are my flowers to you. As long as I live, you will live.
The HooDoo Honey